You might have noticed that I haven’t been here for a while. That’s because after twelve years of taking my medication for bipolar disorder, it suddenly stopped working, and my doctor and I had to hammer out just what to do next.
I’m on Celexa and being on medication keeps me level (SANE ACTUALLY) and as my family will tell you, without it I’m a completely miserable person ready to bite the head off anyone who comes near me. Nasty but true.
I began to notice my hormones out of whack. Thanks to turning forty, I was heading into the crazy land of perimenopause and began having more and more anxiety attacks. My moods began to shift, and I became irritable, lethargic, unable to keep my eyes open, unmotivated, and overall felt crappy pretty much all the time.
Oh, and did I mention that I had gained 92 lbs over the twelve years I was taking Celexa that no diet or amount of exercise could penetrate? Yeah, another grand side-effect of the medication, which is what led me to take the huge leap in making this change.
I had heard of Wellbutrin through online forums where other people suffering from anxiety and bipolar disorder gather to talk. I spend a lot of time in forums and groups on Facebook just listening to others, mostly to help me feel normal because when you have a mental illness like bipolar disorder, normal is the last thing you feel.
And despite my families ongoing and loving support, they don’t really understand what it is like being bipolar. Many people think bipolar is just having bouts of bad depression. They don’t understand the ongoing rollercoaster I go through in dealing with an array of emotions that range from rage to deep sadness my brain just isn’t equipped to handle.
Anyone taking antidepressants will tell you that you have to wait at least a month before you begin to see real lasting results, and there are often side effects that go along with starting a new medication. I will admit I was scared shitless to begin taking Wellbutrin because I had heard the side effects were extremely difficult to deal with.
My doctor suggested I take Wellbutrin 150 mg in the morning. Taking it any later gives you insomnia. I wasn’t interested in my body forcibly staying awake. The other side effects of Wellbutrin included:
nausea, vomiting, upset stomach, diarrhea, extreme body aches, weight gain, loss of appetite, increased sex drive, severe agitation, major mood swings, anger, increased anxiety, hallucinations and nightmares just to name a few.
Sounds fun, right? I was looking forward to the positive side effects taking Wellbutrin and Celexa together can have such as,
weight-loss, loss of appetite, increased sex drive, since Celexa basically killed mine and I missed making out with my husband like two teenagers in the back of a pickup. More energy and alertness.
I was also interested in the fact that Wellbutrin can help you quit smoking. Something I have been trying to do for years but failed at miserably. Quitting smoking is harder than quitting Heroin they say, and shit I would believe it. Damn nicotine sticks have ruled my life for twenty-five years. Being able to quit would be a huge bonus.
Starting Any New Medication Can Be Scary – Talk to Your Doctor About Your Concerns.
It’s been two weeks now since I started Wellbutrin, and in the first week, I was ready to quit. I had the body aches so bad. My fricken toes hurt. I laid on the sofa, ugly crying for four days wishing death upon everyone who had convinced me to do this.
But now after the second week is over, I can say I’m feeling better. I also have no more anxiety. Yipiee! No seriously, you have no idea how fantastic that is. I can actually have a conversation without having a panic attack or feeling anxious about everything.
It’s been totally amazing!
Suffering from a mental illness isn’t easy. Not on your family, friends, co-workers or yourself. But you can get the help you need without any stigma’s being attached. You just have to believe you can get better. No amount of medication is going to cure your mental illness, but it can help you stay level-headed and give you tools you need to adjust to normal situations you would otherwise find yourself out of control in.
Combining Celexa and Wellbutrin has been good for me so far. I’m going into week three and the only advice I can give you is to keep a journal of your moods. Make sure you stay in touch with your doctor at least once a month. Record any side effects you might be feeling. And above all else, realize and understand that it takes time for the medication to get into your system to work properly. It’s never going to be a quick fix.
I plan on keeping you guys updated as time goes on with how I’m feeling while taking Wellbutrin and Celexa together. So far things are good but it can change on a dime. I’m the only one who is control of me and so it’s up to me to make sure my mental state is where it should be.
Thanks for listening.