You have been here before. You are ready to pull out your hair. You’ve tried everything but nothing works, and right now you are just about ready to give up looking for answers to that question that has plagued parents for decades. How do you get kids to listen when you talk.
Well, put away your tears. Here are some tips and tricks you can use to find that communication balance you are looking for on how to open up your kid’s ears without a world war breaking out.
Remember What It Was Like When You Were A Kid
Okay, it was a long time ago but let’s go back. Being a kid isn’t easy. It’s important that as parents we have the skills we need to get the job done. Remember what it was like when you were a kid? Put yourself in your child’s shoes and start by asking what they are feeling.
Tip: Try to remember being a kid in a similar situation. How misunderstood, angry and upset you might have felt about something. Life is about hormones, worries, and challenges when you are a kid and they need to know they have boundaries to help them but also parents who can relate and understand what they are going through.
Picking and Choosing Your Battles
Do your kids upset you when they don’t listen? Do they leave their shoes out? Don’t put away their jackets. Don’t keep their room tidy? The whining and crying are enough to give you a headache but there is a solution. That’s why picking your battles is important. Kids are always stretching their boundaries. They are always pushing their limits to see how far they can go.
Tip: Ask yourself before you deal with any situation “Is this going to hurt my child?” and “Am I calm enough to deal with this right now?” Your answers will indicate whether you need a time out or pause to get yourself calm and decide if this battle is worth having.
Leaving stuff lying around and not cleaning up.
It is the number one thing next to kids not listening that parents complain about. Kids get lazy and as parents we often feel like maids, constantly picking up after them which can lead to frustrations. Want your kids to listen? Have consequences for both good and bad behavior. Give time-outs when things get heated.
Tip: Take away toys and video games and make them something earned. Give kids a choice to either take out the garbage or clean their room. And above all else, teach them that cleaning can be fun and rewarding!
Distractions Are a parent’s worst nightmare during communication.
It’s hard enough to get kids to listen on a regular basis. Throw in some distractions and you might as well kiss your communication bye-bye. Make sure you remove all distractions when having a talk with your child and especially when kids are doing homework, chores or cleaning up.
Tip: Find a quiet spot before engaging in conversation, and make sure your kids are all ears and ready to listen. That way your communication with them will go a lot smoother.
One way to get kids to listen is to get them to talk
I know you’re saying HUH? I want to know how to get kids to listen when I talk. I get that but it is important that as a parent you understand your child needs to feel heard and understood, especially if you want them to listen when you are speaking to them.
Schedule a family meeting once a week so that other members of the family can share what they are feeling. Make sure everyone is on board and respectful, acknowledging one another. It’s a great tool for not only getting your child to open up but teaching them to listen to others when they have something important to say.
Remember open and honest communication is important in any family. No matter what you are dealing with, you can do this as long as you do it together.