It starts with a kiss and those squishy feelings. But sometimes over time, stress, bills, babies and other factors can cause a marriage to come undone. Marriage counseling is something many couples don’t even want to consider in trying to save their marriage, and yet they should.
Many couples are afraid to air out their dirty laundry, especially in front of a stranger. They figure no way can a stranger help, and yet sometimes having someone who is unbiased and geared with professional insight can help to walk you through and give you the tools you need to problem solve when things in your relationship go awry.
Not all marriages need to fail in order to get counseling. There can be many reasons to seek counsel. Sometimes just dealing with issues and learning the right way to communicate can go a long way in helping a marriage rekindle itself.
What You Should Know When Seeking Marriage Counseling
#1. Finding a good counselor is Important.
A good counselor is important. If cost is an issue, and your job doesn’t provide services you need. Check in your local phone book, or hit up your community services to find a counselor geared for the topics of discussion you wish to pursue.
#2. Be honest
It’s important to be honest when you are dealing with matters in life, and especially when dealing with trying to fix things like your marriage. Not only do you need to be honest with your feelings toward your partner, but you must expect to be honest with yourself on your own truths and behavior. Without honesty, you cannot move forward to gain a better understanding of how to fix things.
#3. Don’t be on the Defense
It’s super easy to get your back up when you feel you are being targeted as the bad guy in any situation. Emotions can run high when dealing with marital problems. Remember you are there to fix things. It’s not about who’s right or wrong. It’s about changing your mindset, figuring out how to communicate better, discovering the problems you have and how to make things better. You don’t have anything to prove to anyone. So just be yourself and don’t be defensive if during counseling your therapist points out things you can change both about a situation in your marriage or yourself.
#4. Be Committed
You committed yourself to someone special the day you said “I do”, and so you should be equally committed when trying to fix your marriage or relationship with your significant other. You cannot be half in and half out. You need to be all in if you want to fix things, fix yourself, the problems and learn to have a healthy and happy and loving marriage.
Remember that a loving marriage doesn’t have to be the end of everything. It’s about compromising and being together for better or worse.